CHE BELLO is fed up.

June 14, 2008 at 11:25 pm (Uncategorized)

Here’s the deal, father. (And I know Father’s Day is a rotten time to do this, but you’re the one who brought it up. And if you’re going to continue to read my blog, then I think it’s appropriate to directly address you here.)

Stop trying to micromanage me and what I do or say here. Think about how much of my life I spent not being myself because of fears about how people would react. Think of how many wonderful friendships with people in my community I may have passed up because I was too afraid to come out and show everyone who I am. And then think about how destructive it is when you continue to try to influence my actions or presentation to others.

I’m tired of being censored, and I’m tired of being in the shadow of what you want me to do. So here’s the deal: it stops right now. I’m not trying to turn this into a huge fight, but I’m not going to put up with it any longer.

The next time you try to influence what goes on here, I’m going to post lots and lots of hardcore porn every day for a week. It’ll make my readers (well, a fair number of them) happy, and it will horrify you and maybe even show you that what I do here is not so bad. (Although even if it were bad, it would still be my prerogative to do so.) This isn’t the blog where you get to decide what to read or see. If you want one of those, start your own.

The end.

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2 Comments

  1. Stephen said,

    I haven’t read these comments, but… people are trying to tell you what to write on YOUR blog? WTF?

    If they don’t like it, shouldn’t they simply – – oh, I don’t know – – stop reading it? This would allow the rest of us who enjoy your blog and your posts VERY MUCH to continue to do so without the possibility that you might change what you are doing here.

    The following is a quote that I write on every Opening Night card that I give to fellow cast & crew members. I think it applies here. Always remember this…

    “There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. … No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others”

    -Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille

  2. Jared said,

    Why is it so much of our time is spent, in vain, trying to please our parents? We try to live up to these lofty ideals that they have for us, and when we are unable to, we think that we have to change our entire way of life to make them happy. I don’t know of any other people that have had such control over my life. I’m still struggling with this, and it strains our relations. They have to know what’s causing the strain, but they never bring it up, and I prefer avoiding conflict if at all possible.

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